Selfish

So my birthday was the other day. I am not very sentimental about my birthday so I decided to get my nails done and go home and relax with some wine (alone).

I am at a point in my life that it means so much more to me if I have friends come to a show than to eat with me about of an obligation to celebrate the day I was born. I love celebrating other people’s birthdays but I feel like when someone tells me “Happy Birthday!” its almost the same as “You got a haircut.” Not a compliment, just an observation.

It is our culture to celebrate birthdays (except Jehovah’s Witnesses) and I want to make people in my life feel special and say, “I’m glad that you are in my life. Your parents did a brave thing by keeping you around.” I just feel selfish for me to say, “Hey, it’s MY DAY! Celebrate ME!” when I constantly am inviting friends to shows. “Hey, come see me do what I am passionate about while you sit in the dark and can’t talk to me till after its over.” Comedy, wings, and loved ones are what make my life so rich. I want people I care about to know the comedy part of me and I have no reservations inviting people to come to shows but it’s the ” congrats you made it another year. Sorry you now have to pay for your own health insurance.” that makes me feel weird and undeserving.

Yesterday, I went to my favorite joint, Fox Brothers BBQ. A kind someone knew that I felt weird about my birthday and elected to take me for some wings and drinks. Yeah, I know I have already written about that smokey, flavorful dream of a wing. Yeah, they are just as good as I remember.This time I had them tossed in the sauce. It was a good call. I guess it would have been a better post for me to go to a new wing spot but it was MY day. I wanted some wings that were guaranteed to make me happy. I had to just let go of my hang up about feeling birthday selfish and enjoy being in the moment and enjoy some of my favorite wings in the city. I enjoyed the night and let myself be wrapped up in good conversation and delicious wings.

Sidebar: eating wings with pointy long nails is a blessing and a curse: easier to grip the wings but you get sauce under the nail. (Nothing like spicy BBQ sauce scented dark purple nails)

I plan on eating more wings with friends this weekend to celebrate the friendships and comedy in my life. I hope you can join me.